Thanatological Thru~sday: If Not Today, Tomorrow

(Thoughts on the phenomena of mortality and a study of the ways we, mortals, cope with it… on getting through), until another Thursday then…

This time: If Not Today, Tomorrow

129% of people exaggerate ~ Unknown

April Fools (There, there, it’s still April, besides, a fool is still a fool in any month)!  I don’t know whom to credit this witty quote which, however notfactual, sounds true!

Maybe a more accurate statement would be, 29% of people exaggerate less than 100% of the time and, even then!

We all live an exaggerated life, in the sense, we are naturally fools and fools of nature or, foolish by nature.  Our hollow minds are funneled with inaccuracies, goading us into thinking, then believing what is beyond true, over or understated, inflating our inner reflection, making it appear over our actual state of being, distorted and blown out of proportion until we are full of ourselves and think less of others.

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Thanatological Thru~sday: Rejuvenation

(Thoughts on the phenomena of mortality and a study of the ways we, mortals, cope with it… on getting through), until another Thursday then…

This time:  Rejuvenation

The last few days, I’m feeling a buzz, a reverberating cry for rejuvenation.  Having reached restful sleep after some hard-working months now, in my rear-view, I’m feeling rested and desiring fresh air. Not quitting my day job; work doesn’t “slow” however, with the advent of year-end report deadlines passed, much of the extra pressure has eased in time for spring.  I find myself wanting to spring forth, in a quickening to get busy outside as, with, the birds.

Hearing the fresh sound of early morning bird songs, stirs my inner bird-dog to seek rejuvenation through refreshing, youthful outdoor play.

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Broken Harbor

“The smell of the sea swept over the wall and in through the empty window-hole, wide and wild with a million intoxicating secrets. I don’t trust that smell. It hooks us somewhere deeper than reason or civilization, in the fragments of our cells that rocked in oceans before we had minds, and it pulls till we follow mindlessly as rutting animals….It lures us to leap off high cliffs, fling ourselves on towering waves, leaves behind everyone we love and face into thousands of miles of open water for the sake of what might be on the far shore.”
― Tana FrenchBroken Harbour


There is a stench which comes from what lures us, turning us lurid in quest for what grips us.  As Tana French, author of the Broken Harbour states in the excerpt listed above, “I don’t trust that smell”.

I don’t think we have evolved into anything more today than our ancestors may have been, in-so-far as, their thinking vs. ours, at least, when they began thinking.  The struggle to survive in the human state is our bargaining chip, determining what we are willing and able to trade as well as, our compass in setting sail, embarking toward the promise of wealth, leaving behind all and everyone, at catching the whiff of something more, in general, only to end adrift in our own reasoning.

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New Years Re-solution

The upcoming year is blurry so, abstracting anything except to keep with the ongoing task to re-solution all of the things not previously managed!

Goals and desires not yet completed or dealt with remain on the frontal lobe to do list.  A lot of the time, it can be a stretch envisioning the way to accomplishment from just the spark of interest; sometimes, it’s only a matter of time, but feeling time is gnawing at us can generate additional pressure to complete the to dos.

It’s common to feel caught by the years end catching up with us.  At year-end, it seems people feel it necessary to contemplate or, simply find themselves contemplating, the abstractness of being happy in what they think they might be missing or may have missed during life to this point, not only the previous year’s bustle of happiness-hit-or-miss while bounding between obligation and leisure.

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Three Shades To The Wind

In the present, we are ruminating on the past whether regarding what just passed, looking to a more distant past or, we are anticipating the future and what may happen.  If we experience happiness it is over one of these two ruminations, not ever, is it due to a present feeling only a feeling which is present.  We are three shades to the wind, always clouded by the gray hues, uncertain of the black and white of a thing, are generally looking at the surface of a matter or to its greatest depths in an attempt to reach the heart of the matter.  Intoxicated by the circulating air stream and moved by current trade winds, exchanging places, as we sojourn forward or backward which, exposes our reaction to either, the blowing past or, being blown passed.  These winds of change, often leave us as challenged as the wayward sailor sloshing about in treacherous waves of doubt yet, always steering us forward, only sinking, into thinking.  Our thinking though, is forward thinking.  We are strung by the leash of what was, only after it is and are continually strapped by thoughts of what’s next as, our conciousness is left in the previous place or sent bumbling to another and in no time, we are leaving a place with no time transpiring during transport, traversing mines in space impacting us… something is always blowing up on/upon us; although, in the end, we are the mined, being extracted, having come from what is in space.  We are returning to what is in space, but do not return the same as when we first began.  The big bang, destroyed our innocence as, we were pushed into this senario by a force expanding the universe with it’s presence throughout (Dark Energy) and, we are being extracted by the force of gravity, pulled into the dark mass of which we have no knowledge other than, it’s omnipotent power influencing us, of which, is beyond our grasp.

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Getting your wires crossed

This month has been chock full of crossed wires and double crossing, feeding a growing indignation, as solid lines have been crossed.  I could easily expound in reference to the car accident where another driver crossed the line into my lane and my car, forcing from me, a wailing grunt of disappointment and upon realizing it really had just happened, an audible expletive; however, I categorize this incident as minor when compared to the egregious double crossing perpetrated by the phone company I’ve used for ump-ton years.  My disapproval so great, it prompted me to tele-port my phone lines to another company!  Incredulously, this too was an exercise in getting wires crossed, spawning the communique of this post… customer service, “over and out”.

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Smoke Gets In Your Eyes

Unfortunately, there’ve been an incredible number of simultaneously burning fires across the nation this year, making it rough on many states in the form of smoke not only getting in our eyes and lungs but will surely prove to impair all our finances as well.

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Good Grief!

It’s so difficult to comfort anyone who is grieving because the feeling of loss is inconsolable.  Loss itself is a complex thing to define, mostly because it is wrapped up in our idea of control, believing we own or have power over things and people and believing they are ours and cannot be taken from us; yet, we also, continually fear loss of people or things, afraid they will be taken from us.

When we lose someone close to us, either to death or other circumstances, which may as well be death, if we’re no longer close, as current studies have shown, when we’ve lost touch with a loved one to death, we feel the same type of pain and grieve the same way as we do when losing touch with a loved one whom is still living, regardless of the type of relationship, whether a once close friend, a spouse, through divorce or a breakup with a lover.  In each instance, the bottom line is extreme disappointment stemming from something beyond our control.  We can debate the circumstances of an event and whether we could have prevented it; if it resulted in someone’s death, yet, it still evented; it happened and, to our surprise or not.  We must live without; the loss felt, making hearts heavy with the strain in grieving, wrestling with abandonment, desertion, emptiness and how to cope with this part of the human condition which is faced with knowing, at any time, anything can slip through our hands because nothing is in our hands.

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For Richer, For Poorer

Who, being loved, is poor?

– Oscar Wilde, A Woman of No Importance

One of the best feelings is knowing you’re cared for; a richer feeling, knowing you’re deeply cared for.  A poorer feeling is not being cared for, the feeling, no one cares and a feeling of being of no importance.

All of us are important in our small circles, to someone or several someones, not necessarily in the romantic someone sense, also in other relationships where we are relied on and rely on others. Marriage pacts are like any other agreement, intended for protection, knowing you can rely on someone to care.

The following is an excerpt from Alain De Botton’s, The Course of Love:

“We take this idea of love (being loved, rather than loving) with us into adulthood. Grown up, we hope for a re-creation of what it felt like to be ministered to and indulged. In a secret corner of our mind, we picture a lover who will anticipate our needs, read our hearts, act selflessly, and make everything better. It sounds “romantic,” yet it is a blueprint for disaster.”

It’s one thing to care about someone, it’s another to commit to the care of someone else.  We all want unconditional acceptance, this is where the disaster comes in, we can’t all be indulged unconditionally.  This is where commitment comes in, caring enough to commit to the relationship during times we are not feeling indulged, instead of moving on.

People utter the word love often, but it’s meaning is lost on us because we are not selfless, we are indulgent.  In the best relationships, success is in the timing, since both are continually operating, the alternating between each other’s selflessness and indulgence, though our idea of selflessness is questionable (I’ll save this topic for a later post.).  At any rate, in any relationship, whether lovers, family, friends, etc., there is never fulfilment, no one can meet the needs or desires completely, for anyone else; but we try, that’s the course of learning to love and one day after we’ve all died trying, we’ll have passed the test, having moved on for good, to the fulfillment of love♥